Maybe abit wols but these jokes still rocks!
TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America ...
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?
CLASS: Maria.
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TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
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TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell ‘crocodile?‘?
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L’
TEACHER: No, that’s wrong.
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
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TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it’s H to O.
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TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn’t have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
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TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN: Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground than you are.
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TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ‘I.‘
MILLIE: I is..
TEACHER: No, Millie….. Always say, ‘I am.‘
MILLIE: All right….. ‘I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.‘
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TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father’s cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn’t punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.
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TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don’t have to, my Mom is a good cook.
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TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on ‘My Dog’ is exactly the same as your brother’s. Did you copy his?
CLYDE: No, sir. It’s the same dog.
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TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher
Source:
http://www.playpark.net/forums/viewthread/8500/Chu Kang ( PCK ) explaining sex to Chu Beng’s son, Aloysius ...
Aloy: Why is making love so enjoyable ?
PCK: Aiyah, ah boy, enjoyable becaws, same like when you dig your nose with your finger mah !
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Aloy: Do you think women enjoy sex more than men?
PCK: Of course woman lah ! When you dig dig your nose, your nose feel better than your finger, right ?
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Aloy: Why do women hate it when they get raped ?
PCK: Ai-yah ! Say, you walk along the load(road),den someone come over and dig your nose, you like or not ? Ehhh ? Don’t pray pray ah
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Aloy: Why is it a woman cannot have sex when she is having her menses?
PCK: Oy !! If your nose bleeding, you still go and dig meh?? Siow ah !Use your Blain(brain), use your blainnn ...
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Aloy: Why is it most men don’t like wearing condoms when they are making love?
PCK: Ehhhh, when you dig your nose ah, you like to dig with a glove on your finger or not ? Not the same shiok feeling mah. Corlight
(correct) or not?
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Aloy: Why is making love carried out in private ?
PCK: Ah boyyyyy, use your blain, use your blainnnnn . you go and dig your nose in flont of your whole class izit ?? Stupid lah!!
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Aloy: Wah ...... Uncle Chu Kang, you are very good.
PCK: Aiyah ...... best in Singapore and JB, and some say Batam also ah !!!
Source:
http://www.playpark.net/forums/viewthread/8501/Labels: Forum